Baked Apples

I love fall.  Love love love.  I love the crispness in the air.  I love the smell of the leaves.  I love to watch the trees turn.  I love apples and pumpkins and mums!  LOVE FALL!

When I think I fall I think of warm and cozy things – fireplaces and sweaters, thick hearty soups and stews, and yummy fall desserts like pumpkin pie and baked apples.

I made these the other night and they were truly YUM.

2 small apples (I used fugi apples – because I had them)

Brown sugar sugar twin


vanilla extract

dried cranberries

chopped pecans

1 packet of sugar free apples and cinnamon oatmeal (I found mine at Walmart)


Preheat your oven to 400 degrees.

Slice your apples in half and remove the core with a spoon.  I use small apples because they are the pefect serving size, but you can do this with the big ones as well.

Lay the four apple halves skin side down in a pyrex baking dish.  Sprinkle with brown sugar sugar twin (to taste) and cinnamon.  Add a dash of vanilla extract to each apple.  Sprinkle a few dried cranberries on each apple, and about a teaspoon of chopped pecans.  Sprinkle the oatmeal over each apple half.   Add about 1/2 cup of water to the bottom of the dish and pour about a tablespoon over each apple half.

Bake for 45 minutes.

I’m going to dig my old Atkins pumpkin cheesecake recipe out for Thanksgiving this year.  It’s made with a pecan crust.  YUM.



Body Dismorphia

Am I being too hard on myself?  Am I being honest?  Am I just plain wrong?

I still think of myself as the “fat girl.”  Now, wait a minute, and let me explain.  I AM still fat.  I’m still over 195 pounds.  And I’m 5’4″.  By all rights, I’m obese.

Now, I’m not FAT like I was before.  Because Lord Have Mercy, I was unhealthy fat.  Sick Fat.  I was 321 pounds fat.  But I am STILL fat. 

Do I feel better about myself?  Hell yeah.  I’m healthy.  I look good in the right clothing.  I don’t feel as if I have to hide (do you know how hard it is to “hide” when you are 321 pounds?).  I’m thrilled at the fact that I’ve lost a person.  A WHOLE PERSON.  But I’m still FAT.  Ok, maybe not FAT..but at least Fat…or maybe fat.

I have about 20 pounds to go to get to my surgeon’s goal weight.  I have never in my entire life said that I have 20 pounds to go to get to my goal weight.  That’s amazing to me.  My surgeon wants me around 175 pounds.  In order to qualify for plastics, I have to hit 175 and stay there for at least 18 months.

175 pounds is still obese for my height – obese boarding on overweight.  But, the surgeon’s team also feels as if I’m carrying approximately 20 to 25 pounds of extra skin – on my stomach, arms, thighs and butt.  Oh, and under my chin.  Hello turkey neck.

Here’s my deal though – when I refer to myself as fat, my friends get mad at me.  Seriously…mad at me.   My friends scold me…they say, “You aren’t the fat girl anymore.”  Well, no, I’m not the same fat girl, but I am still fat.  And let me put some context around it.  I never put myself down if I refer to myself as “fat.”  It’s usually in the context of, “Gee, I still think like the fat girl.”  Which is true…when I see a piece of cake, I still get all starry eyed and dreamy…as if George Clooney were standing in front of me in a pair of boxer briefs…..mmm…George Clooney….wait, what?

So, now I’m trying to figure out if I’m suffering body dismorphia on top of everything else.  You see, my brain really does still think like a fat girl.  Given the choice between chocolate cake (hello George Clooney) and a stalk of celery (hello Steve Buscemi) I’m gonna take the chocolate…or at least WANT to take the chocolate.

So, you tell me, when does the fat girl ever go away?


OK, so a big downfall of gastric bypass surgery is the fact that I have to be really really REALLY (did I say really?) careful with cold medicine.  My drug of choice, prior to surgery, was Dayquil and Nyquil. 

I have a horrible cold that has just come upon me.  I’m ok during the day – I can still take Dayquil, and Tylenol Multi-symptom non-drowsy cold works wonders.  But at night – I can’t turn to my beloved Nyquil.  Nope.  Uh uh.  The teensie weensie bit of booze in Nyquil knocks me for a loop, and not in a good way.  Ever get drunk off Nyquil?  Oh yeah, I did.  And for me, the Tylenol Night Time Cold doesn’t cut it – besides, the pills are huge and tend to hurt.  Ugh.

Then again, for about 20 minutes, I didn’t care that I had a cold.

What a Year – It’s Mah Birfday Again…Yay!

12 months ago I posted that I was spending my last birthday as a fat girl.  I was finishing up my bariatric program…I was over 300 pounds…I was in a size 30/32…and I was done being obese.

12 months later, I’m a year older, over 100 pounds smaller…still technically obese, but my BMI is under 35 now instead of 55…and I feel fantastic.

Oh, and now, I’m also a red head.

WHOOO HOOO!  Happy Birthday to me!

Picky Pouch and Wooshies

Noooo….I don’t mean the kind of wooshies than send you to the potty.  LOL

Lately, I’ve been dealing with picky pouch…in that what I put in doesn’t like to stay in.  It’s the same foods I’m eating all the time, they just aren’t sitting well…yanno?

But then I realized…every time I all of a sudden have a huge weight loss (a wooshie) it is generally preceeded by a week or so of picky pouch.  I’m wondering if there’s a correlation…what say ye fair readers?  Have you noticed any kind of indications you are about to have a big weight loss?

I’m hoping this is the case, anyway.  I’m sick of hovering around 198 and 199…gah…it’s like a big old tease.  I want my honeymoon period back.  WAH.

Dinner Tonight – Slow Cooker Jambalaya

I’m making this for dinner tonight (and we can eat it the rest of the week too)…but I’m tweaking it a bit. I’m going to use couscous in place of the rice, and only use about half. As for the sausage, I’m using a nice jalepeno turkey sausage instead of the high fat pork sausage. I’m using boneless skinless chicken breasts too – but that’s what I have on hand. I have no qualms about using legs and thighs, but I don’t have them. I’m hoping that putting the chicken in the crockpot, it will sit in my pouch easier.

Good, Solid Recipe Rate the Recipe Read Reviews (5)

Prep Time: 20 minutes
Cook Time: 5 hours
Yield: 8 Servings
Cost per Serving: $3.63

2 pounds boneless, skinless chicken thighs (I’m using boneless, skinless breasts)
1 pound smoked sausage, cut into 2-inch slices
1 large onion, chopped
1 large green bell pepper, seeded and chopped
3 stalks celery, chopped
1 (28 oz.) can diced tomatoes with juice
3 cloves garlic, chopped
2 cups chicken broth
1 tablespoon Cajun or Creole spice mix
1 teaspoon dried thyme
1 teaspoon dried oregano
1 pound extra large shrimp, peeled and deveined
1 3/4 cups long-grain rice (I’m using couscous)
Parsley, optional
Combine chicken, sausage, onion, green pepper, celery, tomatoes, garlic, chicken broth, spice mix, thyme and oregano in a large (5-quart) slow cooker. Cook on low for 5 hours.

Add shrimp and rice; raise heat to high and cook for 30 minutes more. Sprinkle with chopped parsley, if desired.

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