Dear Pouch,

Eff You.  What the great hell are you doing to me?  Why are we so freaking picky today?  Seriously, you are rejecting everything I put down there.  Tummy ache from freaking hell.  So eff you and the horse you rode in on.  I’ve ignored the copious amount of chocolate my co-workers have given me.  I’m eating all approved foods – foods you have signed off on before.  So knock it the hell off.  I have work to do and dumping this afternoon is Not. In. My. Freaking. Plans.

And…and and and and and…it’s Valentine’s Day – so if you think for one minute that I’m not taking part in my steak dinner tonight, you can get bent.  I know you are taking revenge upon me for the overload of grease yesterday, and YES, I deserved it yesterday when you went on the attack…but today not so much.

So cool it.  Simmer down.  I refuse to be in pain after eating plain greek yogurt and an orange.  And not even a whole orange – a freaking SLICE.

So eff you Pouch.

No love,

Me….the bitch who decides if you get anything or not.


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