Stress Eating Rears It’s Ugly Head

Those of you who follow my “life” blog  know that we had to put our sweet dog down yesterday.  She was full of cancer and it was in her best interest to relieve her of suffering.

Sadie was, for all intents and purposes, my baby.  I’m unable to have children of my own (and I love my step-daughters incredibly much) and Sadie and my kitties are my stand ins for that mothering instinct.  We had gotten Sadie nearly six years ago – adopted as an older dog that no one wanted due to her size.  She was the Best. Dog. Ever.  She had the sweetest temperment, adored our small grandchildren, was loving and faithful, nursed me through illness and surgery, and protected me from harm.  She never barked or growled (except at the UPS man) and I know we’ll never find another dog like her.  We plan on adopting another dog, but not until we return from a two week vacation in May/June.

Yesterday was hard on me.  We knew in the morning that we couldn’t get her in until the evening, and I was working from home.  I had to keep looking into those gorgeous brown eyes knowing that when we took her for a ride later, she wouldn’t be coming home with us.  To make things more traumatic, my husband elected NOT to have Sadie creamated and disposed of by our vet, but bring her home and burry her – not an easy feat since she was over 100 pounds.  That meant that I had to help him get her out of the car, deliver her to the back yard, and put her in her grave.  I did not handle it well.  I was ok until her sweet brown paws and velvety ear peeked out from the blanket they had her wrapped in and I lost it all over again.

And my brain went immediately during the day to stress eating.  I recognized it, and curbed it, but I’m amazed that even after all this time, and all the behavioral changes I’ve made over the past three months, that I immediately thought, “Chocolate is all that will get me through this horrible day.”  I am proud of myself for recognizing it though – and when I did snack, it was fruit or sugar free pudding.

In other news, I had my 15 month follow up yesterday.  I’m still solidly at 189 (yay!) and was down about 5 pounds from my 1 year appointment.  They are thrilled with the strides I’ve made on emotional eating and with my exercise routine.  My body fat percentage is now 40% instead of 41.5% – so I’m going in  the right direction.  I’m hoping to be down another 5 pounds by my 18 month follow up in May.  And, they are going to re-do my labs now instead of at 18 months because I’ve had a huge issue with constipation and leg cramps, so I think they are going to have to tweak my supplements.  I’m thinking I need LESS iron and MORE potassium.  Otherwise a good report!

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